This is going to be a short post, answering a question I recently got on my email, regarding how to actually ask for a girl’s phone number, after you’ve approached her, had a couple of minutes of good chatting, and you genuinely think you want to see this person again.
Now first thing you have to understand is, that there is a social standart that girls will just give out their number to anyone that talks to them, and the reason they do that is so they don’t feel guilty, rude, or judgmental. It’s part of the social courtesy, and this is a thing you as a guy should definitely avoid. And how do you do that?
I: making sure she wants to see you again. – this is a no brainer. If you’re not sure she wants to see you again, why even ask for the number in the first place? A thing you have to understand with numbers, is that they’re just a way for you to make contact so you can meet again. Don’t spend hours upon hours of texting this person. Only use it as a tool to make a second date, in which the logistics are right for you to hook up, or just want to really get to know this person better.
II: making sure it’s not social courtesy. – this concept is big one, and is the main reason the girl’s you’re talking to are just going through the net, flaking you and avoiding the second date. Get her digits after you’ve made sure she knows who you are, actually enjoys talking to you, and is down to really see you again. If you’re getting her number just for the sake of getting her number, your interaction will lead nowhere.
III making sure she knows your intent. – answer me this. When you’re asking a woman for her number, are you upfront and honest about it and saying you want to see her again, or are you making up some excuse for her to give you her number? This is a crucial mistake guys make. If you find out, for example, that the girl is a model, a total fail would be “Hey, give me your number so I can hook you up with my promoter friends!”. The whole point is just being honest, genuine and laid back. If you just go “I want to see you again” before getting her number, your flakes will drop to a minimum. Guaranteed.
IV: making sure she knows who you are. – it’s a common misconception that once you get her digits, you have to wait a certain amount of time before texting. Wrong. Once you get it, text her your name on the spot. That way she knows who you are, and you’re not that random number texting her 4 days later out of nothing “Hey, remember me?”.
V: be discrete about it. – don’t be that guy that comes up to a girl, chats with her, and asks for her number infront of 5 of her friends like a jerkoff. Be discrete, keep it to yourself is she has friends around. The reason you should do that is so you don’t put any social pressure on her. We all know, from the last post, that girls value other girls less if they sleep with lots of men. That’s exactly what you’re implying, asking her for her phone number infront of her friends. Her choices are:
don’t give it to you, and look like a bitch.
give it to you, and look like a slut.
Simply do not put a girl in this situation, and she’ll be thankful for that.
These are the five tips I can give you on avoiding flakes, and improving your results. Now for the actual practical side, this is how you ask for a number.
1. Take out your phone.
2. Give it to her.
3. Tell her to put her number in.
Why this sequence? Let me explain. We as human beings, when given something, a.k.a being handed a phone, our first instict is to take it. Something to keep in mind is, the easier you make it for her, the better. The more comfortable she feels giving out her phone number to you, the higher the change she will. Let this information rest in your head, go out and give it a try, and until next time.
Peace out beast.